Freedom and Sobriety – @SoberMovement

I would like to say a word or two about rock bottom. I think that a lot of people don’t seek help because mainstream society advertises rock bottom as waking up in jail, detox, bathroom floors, a ditch, or wrecking a car, losing jobs, relationships…. been there, done that, and those weren’t rock bottom for me. Those were one-offs, got a little too wasted that night, whoopsies, what a story though! Rock bottom was literally years of waking up looking at texts to see what may have happened, checking the bank account to see where I’d been, asking casual questions to fill in the blanks, wondering who might be mad and why, if I still had a job. Figuring out which bills to pay when to make sure there was always enough for that ‘quick lunch’ that turned into a $300 fight that no one remembered and a hangover. Fighting through that hangover, working out anyways to prove that it wasn’t that bad, just another day. Cliche as it may be, rock bottom was being sick and tired of being sick and tired, and today I celebrate 100 days of knowing what I did and (mostly) why. It took a lot of soul searching to figure out why why why I could have possibly been that thirsty all of the time, what was I searching for? I believe that the answer was freedom. The freedom that i felt way back in the 90s when i had that first sip and felt like I could fly. Turns out the thing that I thought would make me fly was the only thing holding me down. Cheers to club soda and ice cream and sunshine and yoga and all the future memories to not miss out on, and most of all freedom.

Anne

 

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